It's not demonizing. If you are 20 you are a hot young thing. You should be going out being with other hot young things not chaining yourself to an untrustworthy older man. Because this is a time for you to grow as well. You can learn a lot from just experiencing and dating other people who don't already have so much baggage as this guy. I'm sorry but that's true. And I'm reading your post and a lot of caretaking and focusing on this guy is coming through but what about you? Please don't be flattered into being in a relationship, the words might be there but the substance is not going to be. You are going to have to work so hard to keep this person happy but when it's all over, the balance of happiness and sacrifices is not going to be equal and I think you know that now.