Yeah getting kids to do chores can be as tiring or even more tiring than doing them yourself! It is a good thing though, they CAN be helpful and in my opinion children should have a balance between being a kid but also learning responsibility =) So you're right on track there :P

It's funny you mention that about your husband - I've been living with my boyfriend 2 years. He has some issues too that aren't being treated and he has trouble getting stuff done especially around the house. When I'm not depressed it's not too much of a problem - i just pick up the slack. But when I AM depressed for a week or two, the whole place is a mess.

I wonder if being a professional actually gets in the way of cooking for him? Have you tried (I'm guessing you have but just checking) actually splitting which days each of you have to cook? Like you get all Mondays he gets all Tuesdays to avoid confusion? You could tell him he can cook in advance for his days on his days off or whenever so you can heat up things throughout the week. I know my Dad used to make this HUGE thing of lasagne - he'd make the sauce himself, layer the noodles sauce cheese etc - then freeze about 3 pans of it and we'd have one pan over the course of a week. They'd just make veggies to go along with it. then my mom didn't have to do as much cooking the rest of the week. And a few weeks later, more lasagne would come out of the freezer. Maybe as an ex-pro chef he'd be able to manage that kind of portioning and cooking large amounts?

It also must be really hard for him switching shifts around. Not to mention for you too *hugs*