I think your T needs to have better boundaries (she needs to be more like "boot camp" T, not less). I think her behavior is fostering dependency. I'm baffled as to why she is telling you to call her while also saying you are starting to call too much! No wonder you are so confused. In my opinion zoo, you are calling way too much. Calls should be for skills coaching only, as she has said. However, she sometimes says something different, she is not clear when she says to call that it is only to be for phone coaching. I think you are vacillating between the extremes of dependency and independency. All or nothing. T needs to be there all the time vs I don't need T at all. That is symptomatic of BPD. Finding the balance is so important. It seems you have a knee-jerk impulse to call your T whenever you feel anything, and that is causing you to become more dependent on her to make you feel ok.