I had a male therapist, experienced strong feelings for him, and this ended up being very healing for me. I think that things unfolded for me exactly the way I needed them to. Transference is a very personal thing and there is a lot one can learn from it.

Protoform, I'm very sorry for your pain. Part of what transference can do is show you where your needs/wants are and you may then apply this new self-awareness to your outside of the room relationships. I haven't read through the entire thread...did you explore your feelings in therapy with your therapist? This can really be helpful in understanding.