I am feeling left out haha, so many of you have a connection with your spirituality to your mania. I feel more spiritual in a normal state. When I am manic I feel no connection, I feel very aware of the fact that I am not "me" anymore. And I am not connected, and it is scary place.

If I think back to before medication, in mania I might have felt like I was deity, a real sense that I was the breath of the driving force. Before meds mania was a happy thing, felt good. After meds and education mania feels wrong,dark and scary. Had to rethink this whole thing now.

So now you all have me confused. Did I maybe have a spiritual connection before meds? Have meds and awareness of the physical mind state ( lack of better term) destroy the spiritual connection?

Venus, and everyone that shared, thanks for giving me something complicated to stress over