sunrise, thanks for explaining more about the Self. I use "I" for the parts but my T keeps saying "it's a part of you, not all of you." That's the problem. I say "I am sad and want T" not "a part wants her, for example." She has to keep reminding me that I have parts. She also tells me, or used to, that my parts are running the show, whereas my Self is who we're trying to get to "run" it. I'm not sure who I am in the first person!

Maybe yoga and meditation help lessen anxiety so I can find my Self, or get centered. I know it's something like that.

I think it was easier for you because you don't have BPD. I have to work hard to want my Self, whatever it is, to want to comfort my parts. That's why T says she will be there too.

Wiki: IFS is very powerful and helpful. I hope you do it. Please post or send me a message about it if you do it!