They didn't used to have that forum, and when it was first created, it was much broader and about all types of transference. Since many posts about therapy involve transference, many members thought it was odd to divert so many posts to the subforum and it would make the main forum a much different place if transference couldn't be discussed without those posts getting whisked to the subforum by the moderators. So the subforum came to only include Romantic transference, but the original intent was otherwise. (I personally did not have a problem with posts on any type of transference being in the main forum, and I don't think I was alone.) Just some history for you.

Why would my T's disclosure mention a phenomenon that comes from a different therapy tradition than he practices? (My T is humanistic/existential, in which the therapist and client do have a real relationship.) It would be like asking a CBT therapist to put in the disclosure that the client may experience painful criticism of his/her thinking patterns and worksheets that provoke much anxiety. But should all therapists have to put that in? Therapy can be painful--whether its transference, recalling or reliving long-buried traumas, having one's tried and true way of thinking frequently criticized, having to sign contracts not to self harm when that behavior has been very helpful, facing hard facts about oneself, etc. I don't need it mandated that a T lists every single potentially difficult element of therapy in their disclosure form. I never expected therapy to be easy when I began.

I am all for Ts explaining how therapy works at the outset of therapy or each step as you go along. Just like a doctor explains the steps of a procedure. I just don't need that mandated in a legal document. Perhaps a statement in the disclosure that therapy can be difficult and sometimes painful could suffice.

I don't have romantic transference toward my therapist, but we are very close and I am strongly and securely attached. This has been a good thing for me. I did not expect this would happen and it has been a delight and very healing. It's actually been kind of cool that it just unfolded as we did therapy and I didn't know that it would happen. I know that's not a good reason for a person to be in the dark, but the whole surprise element of it has been a positive for me. My T never hid any of this from me, and in fact asked me very early in therapy if I might not be feeling less depressed due to our positive relationship. I was kind of but yeah, there was a lot to that. He doesn't keep how therapy works a secret, but sometimes you don't need to discuss every nut and bolt of what's happening. We focused on the problems in my life instead of the positive feelings between us. The positive feelings, in fact, helped us make a lot of progress on my problems.

One of my favorite books on psychotherapy (Making Contact: Uses of Language in Psychotherapy, by Leston Havens) shows how the therapist can vary the "distance" between himself and the client by the words he chooses. Havens explains how some clients need more distance and some less, and this can vary each session too. He knows how to use the right language to create the right distance for that client at that moment. It is definitely not a one size fits all in how he treats clients. When I hear how your therapy went, Protoform, it makes me wonder if your T misjudged what level of distance would be therapeutic for you? You also mentioned that you have autistic disorder, and I am hearing that you think because of that you may have been particularly vulnerable to your T's positive regard. I am listening to all this and considering implications for my own practice (I am studying to enter the mental health field). I think sometimes a referral is called for in therapy.

Protoform, it sounds like you have been very hurt by your therapy experience. Your lawsuit almost sounds like some kind of revenge, even though not directed just at your T. Like now you think all Ts are bad/incompetent/dangerous and need your censure? Do you think this suit will help you feel better? Maybe you've tried, but could there also be other ways to work on your strong feelings of anger, hurt, betrayal, etc.?