You can't just get over this, you need to have help to resolve your past so that your present can be rewarding. Is there anyway you can see a therapist or a counselor? What happened to you was not your fault and you deserve to feel good about yourself and your relationship with your husband. Maybe if you were to see a counselor you could ask your husband to cool it for a while so you can focus on getting on with things. When you are able to work through the pain you will be able to be more loving and emotionally available to him.