Quote:
Originally Posted by CesarioRose
So, i'm sure this'll sound more like i'm fishing, but i'm kind curious. So i'll tell a small/short story. My family was joking with me today about how when i was young i'd identify my self as either Otis or Milo It's a movie from my childhood; Milo and Otis, and people would talk to me assuming i was either name. I would sign in at the pool we'd go to as either. Considering i was at a fair age, 5 or 6 or so, kinda right around the time we know I started to dissociate frequently. But I am not sure on the age, wherein lies the question...
For those of you who experience constant dissociation throughout your lives, how do you cope with not being able to discern a timeline or even remember stuff similar to this "on demand." Like your at a party and everyone is talking about their childhood, and you're kinda like in your head "i wish i could remember stuff... lucky people." or some such. I feel kinda crap sometimes especially when asked directly, or they kinda glare at you for not participating.
This morphs, i know, directly in working with parts and members of the system  , and formulating memories as they come up, and documenting them. But...
How do you cope with this?  |
most adults around here dont talk about their childhood at parties, they talk about their present life and things they have in common ie work, music, movies, books, the food and drinks at the parties, most adult parties are not the approprate places to go into when I was a child this and that happened. its usually after parties and after you have established some sort of friendship that adults talk about their childhood memories. by then you pretty much know how much of your childhood you can share, including whether or not you have memory problems associated with your childhood.
example when i go to a party people ask me what kind of work I do, whether I enjoy living in the town Im in, Whether I have read this book or that one, whether I saw this movie or that one and what I think about those books and movies, what its like being in college, what classes I take, whether I take them for credit or for my own interest. then if we hit it off at the party we make plans to meet in a coffee shop or restraint. then we go from there from being acquaintences to friends. its during the friendship that we go deeper into each others lives and childhood.
then I tell them what I feel comfortable telling them. if we end up on a topic that Im uncomfortable with because of holes in my memories or because of the topic I tell them honestly that my childhood wasnt a normal childhood and at this time Im not comfortable discussing it with them. then we go on talking about things we both have in common and are comfortable discussing.
the adults around here in general dont usually make this big fan fare about talking about holes in their memories or traumatic things. adults usually talk about common ground things and not worry about things we cant remember. there is much more to the world and each other than just our trauma's and holes in our memories.
