Abusive relationships ard tough, it's push and pull, sometimes it goes so great that you canny imagine being in anything else but most of the time it is going so wrong and you find yourself just waiting for that feeling of greatness again. The times it comes around are too far and few inbetween though Hun, you need to get out of it, it is unhealthy for you and making you hurt yourself. You also need to work on some copIng straggles so that when you are upset you aren't cutting. I feel badly for you but I don't want you to feel ashamed. That is not an emotion that does any goos. Recognize the mistake and take the nessassary steps to make sure that you are in a stronger, safer place so that it doesn't happen again. Lastly you get to hate this boy who is being terrible to you, hate him! It is the only force that will drive you to end it