After posting in the thread about contact with T, I realized I feel very bad about my T's rule. I liked it so much when she responded to each email (I never emailed more than 1 or 2 except once) in detail. It made me feel like she really cared. Now, no matter what or how much I email, she only responds once, and she doesn't address my concerns. She tries to be positive and give a generic response.

I feel sad about her rule. I don't have a choice, and I know she did it for me, not to punish me. At least I get my one email every Friday, but I read about others who get detailed answers like I used to do, and it hurts me.

I never talk about everything in my emails, either. There's too much, and no time in the session. My T doesn't like when I read from an email; she wants me to be in the present, with her, not back in the past week. I agree about that, but it's still frustrating. I have so much to say that doesn't get said, and I miss her responses. She always said the goal is that it will be more about MY hearing my feelings and not needing her to hear everything I write. But she does read all of my emails.

I don't know. I'm just feeling sorry for myself right now. I miss my T,(session is tomorrow) and I feel like a volcano waiting to erupt.