Hi, Krazy Phoenix. I sort of understand where you are coming from. I had the "opposite" problem though, I never forgot anything. My mother died when I was 3 so I assume I remembered everything to keep it all there/together? Kind of like it sounds like you have forgotten because of your mother's "blankness". My stepmother was too organized, neat/clean too.

I had a lot of therapy which helped me, got to "know" my mother and separate her from my stepmother and get my head organized and my own so I didn't feel so helpless about myself? I got a little bit better every 10-20 years/time I moved, LOL. This last time (2005) I was able to let go of a lot and start "fresh" and I've been pretty good since. I have a corner or two that are difficult but I'm working on them. One thing that helped me was not feeling bad about the mess/way I did/didn't do things. Those are symptoms and are working to help you with mental/emotional problems. Let them. Let them become part of you and know they are helping you? Not carrying around guilt and "shoulds" because of one's mother can help the process a bit. I would try to think of a plan on how to "neaten" the piles, box and label them well instead of totally ignoring them.

The bins sound like a good start and maybe the "current" clothes your kids are wearing; get a cheap camera and take pictures of them in their outfits but get rid of the outfits when they get too small? Maybe start a journal for each child and describe things and take a picture, start to take up less space than the actual item? Even if you could only do every other outfit at first, that would help wouldn't it? I would get a notebook and pick up each baby item and describe the picture you see in your head, the memory. Maybe take a writing class (I took a lot and loved them) and make something of all those memories!