Feeling what you felt when you were abused is called having a flashback. As you have found out trying to give other reasons and logic to them doesn't work. The best thing that has helped me is instead of fighting against the flashback I find a quiet place where I can be alone and I listen to my relaxation music or a tape of my favorite songs. I just let the flashback play though while I listen to the music for grounding as I write or draw what I am feeling. then when I am not in the heat of the moment I continue to write and draw, use clay and playdough or shoe boxes to make that flashback this basically desensitizes me - each time that same flashback replays and I do this it gets easier and then one day I notice I have been on eggshells all day waiting for it to happen when it didn't after a while that flashback does not come back. Basically I use the idea of hey if its going to hit me it might as well hit me on my terms and I force myself to think about it, create scale models of it and so on. Then its gone.