That is to certain people. I have SI'ed recently after 3 months of not doing so, I've done it 3 times so far in a month. I haven't said anything to the treatment team, and frankly, I don't want to. But SI is not all of it. Certain thoughts have returned. I'm scared. I have been trying to face this fact of why I SI, but, it's just to uncomfortable. I hate my life, Self-esteem, what's that? Oh ya, something that I have lost since I started to treat my body so harshly, and what good has it done. Only make me feel only a little bit better.

I do feel quilty not telling my treatment team but oh well, life goes on, right?