blah. I don't know...I want to go see T, I want get some closure and to hopefully have some better feelings about everything, but there is such a real chance that it won't go well, that I will leave more upset and more torn up than before. Which in itself is not fun, but it's the fact that it takes me DAYS to get back to something resembling baseline that is giving me second thoughts.

Diz, thank you for saying I have been brave. I don't know if I am brave enough to keep taking that chance, though. It would be a lot more peaceful to just stay home in bed with my knitting.