Thread: Fake
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Old Jun 24, 2011, 09:58 PM
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geez geez is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 2,371
Quote:
Originally Posted by SilentLucidity View Post
I totally understand what you mean by feeling "fake." I am still new to working with my T and for the first month I felt "fake" most of the time until I realized it was because for the first time I was finally being honest with myself. Which of course seems odd because it is not the in control me I present to everyone else. I'm working on ways to marry the me in my head with the one I present to the rest of the world. I'm not sure what that ceremony will look like, but I have promised to throw myself a kick @ss reception when it happens - there will be dancing!

Just this week I found something poking out from a dark corner in my brain that I need to bring up with T at some point. My problem is voicing it makes it real and if I just keep it in my head then it remains "just a thought." Typing that makes me feel silly.

(((silent))) I love the idea of having a reception! I have been with T for a while. It's your comment of 'finally being honest with myself' that I'm having a hard time dealing with. T called me to the carpet on a few things during my last session that were very painful for me to hear and I felt like such an awful fake person as a result.
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"Be careful how you speak to your children. One day it will become their inner voice." - Peggy O'Mara


Don't ever mistake
MY SILENCE for ignorance,
MY CALMNESS for acceptance,
MY KINDNESS for weakness.
- unknown