Remember my post about my T never responding to my email:?

Well, she responded but, to me, what she was saying was irrelevant according to what I needed. I was just like, okay, I'm reading this but, whats this have to do with my problem?

anywho, to put it in short, this is what I emailed:

Dear T,

I need to say this. I can't wait until next session to say this because crying embarrassed me. Just wanted to say that I hope you don't think me crying at the end of session is for attention or purposely done...

Jazzy.

And then I went on to say WHY I felt like crying and why it felt uncontrollable to me.

This was my T's Response:

"I'm so glad to hear more of your heart. Your expression/emotions are beautiful and precious, even when it doesn't feel controllable or comes when you might feel like it is inconvenient. When it comes, accept yourself (as I, also, accept you!) and affirm yourself that it's okay to be emotional when you need to be! I know you want to feel good and I believe that you will, many times, feel good. But if there are days and moments you don't, I really believe it's okay. As you keep walking, even as you feel the pain, you are growing.

Blessings on your week, and just let me know the next time you want to schedule to come in. ..."

..............................
Yes, the email was nice. Maybe it just wasn't what I was needing at the time.
I don't know.? Maybe because, her reaction to my tears didnt feel like she was thinking "oh, this is beautiful and precious."
MY T actually looked very very confused because I was crying when I paid and as I walked out the door. And I
know she was doing her job as a therapist in not letting my reactions effect her. Especially, cus I assume she had a client right
after me and she wasn't going to just connect to all my sadness when she didn't have time too and the session was over.
IDK, I'm sure she's being truthful with me, just her reaction didn't speak to me as oh, this is "beautiful and precious"
and how is someone breaking down out of nowhere beautiful? lol. confused a little...