wow.

Reading about what other people have been through on these threads has made me feel so grateful that my symptoms are not worse, and Im amazed at some of the insightful sensible advice you all give each other too.

So far, Ive never heard an actual voice, outside my head, not really anyway, but, I have had the experiance that I could hear people talking about me outside and everytime I got up to the french doors to listen to what they were saying, they would stop, and Im absolutely convinced, or have been in the past, that there are messages for me on the radio. I should stop listening to it really, but sometimes, when Im fairly sane like now,its just a delusional little thought and its sort of seductive, makes me feel less alone.

I have in the past thought that I was being watched and stalked, and when i was very ill, I thought I was posessed, I could almost feel something moving inside of me.EEK! lol

The hardest thing to cope with is that its just so unbearably lonely to have all this going on, my friends cant really cope. They vascilate between telling me theres absolutely nothing wrong with me and occasionaly admitting I might have a bit of a problem.But its not something I can talk to them about.

They know Ive been on antipsychotics, but oddly enough, Im therir counsellor, everyone seems to come to me for someone to talk to and advice.

But, I cant even sort my own life out.

Does anyone get really weird panic attacks, - its like a black space opening upinside your head?