I can relate SO MUCH to your situation. All through my teenage years, I would develop friendships with older women and I would dream about them holding me at night, them always being there for me to talk to, and wanting to spend my time with them rather than going out with the guys my friends thought were "hot." I just never understood the feelings and the attractions that my friends developed for guys. Still, I tried to date guys because I thought I was "supposed" to and I thought that, at some point, I would start feeling the way my friends did. But those feelings never came. Instead, my feelings for the older women in my life got progressively stronger. I didn't immediately think I was lesbian or bi though because I'm so feminine in terms of appearance, mannerisms, etc. and I had the (incorrect) belief that lesbians looked or acted a certain way. I thought that lesbians were necessarily masculine, but that isn't the case-- that's just a negative stereotype. Eventually, I realized that I am in fact a lesbian. I'm feminine and I'm attractive to feminine women, and there's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with having attractions to women, or older women specifically. There's also nothing wrong with not having attractions to guys. We can't choose who we're attracted to.

I'm not saying you are lesbian, or bi, or anything else. No one can tell you what your sexual orientation is; that's something only you can know (and you will figure it, in time). All I can say is that I relate to your situation, and whether you're straight, bi, or lesbian doesn't matter. They're all "okay" and "normal." Just allow yourself to feel however you feel, about whoever you have feelings for. And don't force yourself to try and have feelings for someone you don't. It's okay NOT to have those feelings, too. Just try and enjoy your sexuality, however it develops.