Gentle hugs to you ((spacebound)).

The tough times are very tough . Thankfully, they do pass. Sometimes, it takes waaay too long for the rough times to pass. Just keep trying to remind yourself of the good that you are doing. You are doing good things to be proud of!

You haven't left your children to bear the pain ~ pain that you felt as a child, after your mom left. Hopefully, you are also working with a T to get some helpful techniques in working through your thoughts & emotions. If not, please do reach out for some assistance. Maybe a new or up in medication is what you need to make a difference in the dark times.

Best wishes to you!