i don't like to do things by myself; i have horrible anxiety. i rarely want to go anywhere of my own choosing, except grocery shopping, & she doesn't mind going with me. she is rarely in a bad mood.

i don't mind doing things with her, but we come from very different backgrounds. her family is super social & loves to do things together. i come from a family where we stopped doing family things by the time i was 10. i have slowly, slowly gotten used to doing things with her family, but sometimes, it is still just too much, & i get tired of it. but because she can't say no to her family (or won't), i get stuck going with her too, otherwise it's a big fight.

back on the subject of health & insomnia...i get blood & urine tests done semi-regularly, but i honestly don't know what tests they are doing, or what tests i should ask them to do. my regular doctor is foreign & hardly speaks english, which makes it horrible to speak with her. i get my medical care at the VA, & i have no health insurance, so i have no other choice but to go there. it's virtually impossible to get a new doctor unless the one you have leaves.

i do have asthma; i've had it for almost 10 years now. it's never really affected me outside of exercising. so not really sure what the problem is. insomnia has come & gone over the years, but it's so frustrating when it "comes". i feel like a hypochondriac sometimes; it just feels like there is always something wrong with me that has no real solution