I had a really hard session today. We got into talking about my being attacked and the details of it. It just makes me want to cut. I was sitting there in session and all I wanted to do was cut my wrists. But I couldn't tell my T. And then session was over and there wasn't time to mention it. I still want to cut. I want to make all the bad feelings go away. I feel so awful. And she is out of town next week. I feel so alone. She said that I should write or do art or go on a walk. But I feel so awful inside. And it's not like I can take a walk as it is in the middle of the night now. I don't want to keep fighting the feelings. I feel so awful I don't even have the words to explain it.