Sorry for confusion...I remember everything that happened after age 12 and while that was difficult to talk about ...I did not consider that to be abuse..it just was what it was...but my T. says that those things were abusive...

But there is far more shame, panic and anxiety when we try to discuss prior to age 12...every time we do discuss we try to start where I do remember like school...then we either try to back up...like getting ready for school or going forward like getting home from school...but its like hitting a wall...

I too want to remember so badly...