Pardon me for not responding earlier and for failing to establish a realistic solution to your problem.

As I may have mentioned earlier, I don't know your "husband", and I apologize in advance for jumping to conclusions. You said you wouldn't mind poverty when you no longer have to support your children. But since he is so quick to employ manipulative tactics now -- button pushing, threats, and so forth -- would he do the same 5 years from now with a different tactic? Bullies have a tendency to escalate their tyrannical behaviour when lesser forms fail to be effective.

I advise, if you'd like my advice, to at least start taking notes of his behaviour and obtaining evidence to support your case when you decide to leave (unbeknownst to him, of course). You could start with his religious practices.

I also recommend talking to a lawyer (not one of his buddy lawyers) about any and every angle you can work to get out of there as quickly as possible (again, without his knowledge). It couldn't hurt to at least see what could be done about the situation.