I was both, abused and the abuser as a child. I have never spoken to anyone about it before. I have an appointment with a T in about a week. I'm so screwed up in my head. I don't know where the world begins and I end. That doesn't even make sense. There are HUGE gaps of my childhood that I have no memory of. Of the memories I do have from my childhood they're colored with severe confusion, and vividly traumatic events. I do not remember my mother/father ever being around. Where were they???? Why do I just block them out?