this is hard to discuss but ...

do you ever seek out abuse? ......the internet allows us plenty of places to find this ....

do you find things seem to cycle .. its when i am very upset that i head in this direction

it makes me sick that i cannot stop this permanently

i ask to see if i am alone in this.... lol i probalby am

Im wondering if this is just another form of self harm - i was used as a child but im an adult now... its a long time ago