I've wanted to die for a long time, but i've attempted to keep myself alive....which i have

But today has pushed me over the edge...

The one guy who i have had a crush on for a long while has gone for a "walk" with one of my best friends...on my birthday.

He's the reason that i've been alive for 6 months. if it wasnt for him, i'd be long dead by now...even if i tried many times.

But now i have no reason to live.

(Not suicidal, just dont want to live.)

How have you all been? xxx