Well I guess the reason I post the anguish is because my brain seems to LOVE focusing on the negative. I usually post on here looking for help or support. With a positive post I wouldn't really know why I was posting. She has helped me come a long way. Like I said im my other thread I used to SI quite often and would have Sui attempts averaging every 2 months. It has been over a year since my last Sui attempt and my SI is a lot less compared to where it used to be. She has taught me a lot about myself, has shown me new ways to cope, has taught me that I am capable of doing things on my own, always is there for me when I need her, goes above and beyond for me. She even called me from her vacation in Hawaii once to see how I was coping...