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Ok so i admit i havent read many of the replies here ...i just wasnt able to , but i do understand seeking out abuse. Going to try not to make this a terribly long rant.. Growing up the only time i was told that i was loved was during the abuse. Somewhere along the way i really think i mixed up love and s*x , so for a long long time as a teen i sought this out because it was what i knew. After a while i finally got married and was pretty much in the same situation.. Now here at age 43 im still finding ways to put myself in situations where i am being hurt.. sometimes i wonder if i will ever stop.
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