When he controls you with threats, do you check them out to see if they are valid?

Does your 'remaining kind' somehow negate his cruelty?
Given what you describe, if it was me, he'd be walking to work if he car wasn't running.

I do not know Canada divorce laws, but if you haven't already, you might talk to an attorney to find out what your husband can and cannot do if you were to divorce him.
I'm wondering how, apart from material things, does your unhealthy relationship with your spouse benefit the children.