cstrong, I am sorry you are having such a tough time of it. I wonder what would happen if you did an internet search for places that specialize in this type of thing. We must know more then we used to. I am not taking this lightly at all, you must be in a living hell. I wonder if there are residential programs for you and baby? Also, you mention the responsibility and guilt for bringing another life into our messed up world and feeling soley responsible for what happens in her life. That is a lot to take on. We do the best we can and heck yeah babies are a ton of responsibility. Sometimes a little faith helps. Please hang in there and keep us posted.