Thanks for the responses. I think I cut because of the feelings that come about after I don't do something as well as I think I should. I have extremely high expectations of myself. I am a perfectionist. Even when someone tells me I did a good job, I tend not to believe it...I think they are just saying it to be nice. When I was growing up, my two brothers were often in trouble, so I took it upon myself to be the "perfect child" so that my parents would have at least one good child that they didn't need to worry about. Nothing I do is ever good enough in my eyes.....which leads to feelings of anger and failure, and thus leads to the cutting. What I am struggling with now is the fact that I don't care anymore....the cutting doesn't bother me anymore, and how do you change something if you don't think it is a problem (I am tired of everyone else telling me it is a problem). I am having the thoughts of "why should it matter....it is my body so I should be able to do anything I want to it". Some people choose to get tatoos or piercings, or whatever; I choose to cut. (Although lately I have had an urge to get a tatoo, but I think it would be more of an SI thing versus actually wanting the tatoo). I am glad I am not alone in this. By the way, my husband doesn't know that I have been cutting. He thinks I haven't cut in a year (I have gotten very good at hiding it from him). Although if things keep going the way they are, I am going to have to tell him so that if I do end up in a hospital, it won't be such a shock to him.