thanks again......
BTW, does anyone think I am playing games, and just being borderline? A friend who was on my case this morning thinks I am just playing games and CHOOSING to think this way, CHOOSING to be in the pit, CHOOSING to worry so much about money/the future that it is disrupting my today. Just a choice that I should change, as if it were so damn simple......if it were that simple, I would totally do it......I have done it before, but as I have said, there are things that make this feel so different, things that won't leave my mind, things that feel like bleak reality that I can't handle....it's so hard. I hate it. If she thinks it is a game, fine, let her think that. I can't change her mind anymore than I can just change my brain......