If he is not physically abusive and you do not feel endangered in that way; I would work on getting a plan together for yourself, never mind whether he likes the crying or not! I would even work on making a plan together with him; perhaps more conversation/discussion might help your situation.

Have you all had a real conversation about how the marriage doesn't seem to be working without blaming one another? It sounds like you are both major stressed and that certainly can cause angry outbursts and negativity, especially I think in a man not taught a whole lot of other ways to deal with his stress?

I would tell him you would like to try a separation and ask him would he help you. Definitely try to find places for the cats for a bit; lots of times humane societies will "hold" or foster them, especially if you are in such a difficult situation.

If it is mental/emotional abuse you are dealing with, see if making a plan for yourself and working on it helps block most of the hurt/focus on the abuse. Looking outward and toward your own future should get your head/heart going forward instead of feeling quite so stuck.