My Support Forums - View Single Post - My girlfriend is pregnant but I'm not happy with our relationship.

NSH4 · Jul 13, 2011, 05:50 PM

I did, and no he doesn’t. ("SHE IS WORKING ON IT") It’s not fair to my girlfriend’s daughter that her dad don’t want to take care of her. My girlfriend tries a lot to make sure that she can see her dad. Usually he is the one who just decides not to at the last minute. And I do want things to work, I know I am not happy because things seem to be going nowhere; but is this just because we never got to know each other any other way?

I don’t want to leave my kid and I feel if we can just find ways to get along maybe things could work? I understand this is a part of life, being responsible and “Maning up” so to speak. But when you’re doing your best and it doesn’t seem good enough what do you do then?

I am trying for two reasons:

1) I don’t want to be a father paying child support and seeing my kid on weekends. I always told myself I would be a better father than that. (I hate that my father did it to me; and I was stupid enough to try and give him a second chance when I was 18 and he blew me off again.)

2) I Un-happy because it seems no matter what I do to try to work on things it just simply doesn’t work.

I don’t mean to whine about this either but if I were in a similar situation without having a child involved in the mix and I seen things weren’t working because apparently were both to “Headstrong” then I usually break things off at this point after trying. But knowing I have a kid on the way and knowing that if we just took the time to work on things maybe things could impove keeps me here.

I am not looking to change her or be changed I’m looking for a way were we can work on things, and sadly her job has no benefits at all and I would only feel worse making her pay for something else. It’s bad enough that there are times when we are arguing and it’s like “You’re not her dad” which I understand but It leads me to thinking even though I’m not, I’ll be dammed if I’m going to be disrespected by someone I help raise. And “This isn’t your house” cause I don’t pay bills.

Another great example of the types of arguments we have is how I want to grow out my hair and she threatens to leave me if I do so… (To me this shows she is no way committed to the person but the appearance of the person and she’s already stated I’m the best looking boyfriend she has had.) It just makes me question things.

I am clueless with all of this and just don’t know what to do. It may be something petty but I don’t know I just feel like other then knowing all of this happened to soon… its always going to be an uphill battle.