Quote:
Originally Posted by PTSDlovemycats
"What is it about you that makes you think that you are so special that you can call me whenever you want and then expect me to call you back like I owe it to you? You are the only patient I have that does this. I think you think that you are worse off then every other patient I have. You aren't. There are many that have had it a lot worse than you and they never call me. Yes you have flashbacks, yes they are hard but you got through them. You are so dependent on me and you think that you need to call me to help you get through anything that is bad and you don't need to do that and it needs to stop. So what is so important that you needed me to call you?"
Then she talked about boundaries and how I cross them because I don't understand them. Then she made a really hurtful comment to me about my lack of friends...
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I have to say that this is one of the most obnoxious things I've ever read.
I grew up with abuse, and I know that I have let people in my adult life treat me in a way I shouldn't be treated. Even people who are in my circle of friends. I KNOW how hard it is to know what the "right" reaction is. I would think "gee, M is being SO mean, but maybe I'm just overreacting" or whatever. Slowly, slowly, slowly through therapy, I'm learning how people are supposed to be treated and I don't question myself in the same way anymore. I can stand up for myself, or distance myself, things I didn't know how to do before. How can you learn this when you are being talked to like she is talking to you? I learned by watching MY THERAPIST and EXPERIENCING the treatment he believes I deserve. And now it's kind of ingrained. I wish I could have learned it earlier in life, because it would have saved me a lot of pain, and I know I still have a long way to go, but it's getting easier to recognize. I can tell you that SHE is not keeping good boundaries, at ALL, by dumping her negative, ugly feelings on you like that, all wrapped up in blaming and shaming.
I hope you talk to the other psych soon to get some perspective. I REALLY get that it's hard to trust your instincts and pull away from this kind of relationship...especially with all of the intermittent rewards (gifts! phone calls! exercise buddy!), but I hate to see anyone be treated in such a way.
I hope this isn't worded too strongly. I don't usually have/express such strong feelings about someone else's therapy, because I'm not *there*, but if she is saying the things that you are writing here, it is really completely unacceptable behavior from a FRIEND, let alone a therapist. Ack!
I'm sorry about your mom, cats. I do hope you get the loving, boundaried support that you need.
