Sleeps,
I'm sorry you are so very tired.
I understand so much of what you're saying. It's good you posted this..... this way, I can give you some of the support that you so much deserve.
I am here listening. (though, my computer is in the shop--it crashed

I'm using my husband's and don't have much time to be on here presently-- but hopefully, in a few days I will have my comp back)
You can PM me anytime.
Sleeps--
mandy