(((Laura))) I really feel for you. I know those dark places with no motivation or purpose. Technically this is psychosis, as you know that it isn't true.
I hope this passes soon, and commend you on being so brave to be honest and open up to your friend. And she's right- you need to let the professionals in your life know, and let them help you.
We will never LIKE taking meds, but eventually learn to accept the fact that they are necessary. Please don't stop/start your meds. You need to get stable, and only with consultation of your pdoc and T, eventually wean off them if that is what you want.
Good to hear you're getting out the house. Socialising is a good idea too, but I'd be very weary even vaguely considering a relationship while the road is so rocky.
In the meantime, keep your friends close and stay strong. Keep yourself away from dangerous situations or potential threats; even triggers
We're here for you