oh, ladyj. Your T has crossed a boundary. I don't see how you can stay with him. I know how painful that realization is. It's HIS fault, not yours. There ARE many, many decent Ts out there who will not violate your trust in this way. I really think you need to find someone else. This has happened before, you said? I am very sorry if that's the case with another T as well. It's just bad luck. It's not YOU.