Hi Lily, thanks for sharing.

I relate to what happened to you in some ways. I get the being afraid to leave home alone, picking up obsessive habits, associating recent events with past events, or vice versa. I think your therapist is correct in his/her thoughts that there is PTSD.

13 is a young age and with no experience of intimacy, it makes the situation worse. I get that. I was the same, though older (17, as I still am currently.) From my own experience with my therapist, I think the advice would first be coping skills, then working through the two events separately, as well as placed side by side. The second event perhaps reinforced or gave reality to your fears that may have been buried in your subconscious. The 'once bitten, twice shy' phrase definitely has meaning here.

Take a look at this thread: http://forums.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=16719 - it gives ways on coping with life and focusing on the present.

My therapist gave me a strategy for whenever I think about what happened to me - take the thought, park it in the corner of your mind and say "I will not think about this now, I'm busy doing what I'm doing, I'll come back to it later." And you don't have to come back to it anytime soon, only when you and your therapist think the time is right. It may not work every time, but it can help a lot.

The grounding techniques in the thread I gave the link to above should help with the panic attacks. I know the feeling, like something is creeping up on you and overpowering you and surrounding you, but it CANNOT overwhelm you. You are in control. Think back to a time when you felt and were strong, and remind yourself that it is still within you. You can kick those feelings of fear out because you are strong. The two men from the two incidents don't deserve your time or energy.

For the low mood, as is common with people with PTSD, that is probably depression. What has your therapist said about it? If it's causing a large problem, you could go and see your GP. Also, may I ask what the symptoms are of your OCD?

One thing that has probably remained with you, maybe without even realising, is the lack of a feeling of closure. After you told the police, nothing else happened, I assume. If it had, the case may hve felt more closed and done with in your mind. But you can work through that with your therapist. The man may be long gone, and so he needs to be gone from your mind. Easier said than done, I know.

No matter the degree of what happened to you, it still happened and it doesn't matter if other people have gone through worse. This is about you and what you went through. There are no comparisons because every mind is different and handles things in different ways. What you went through was your own trial and you can overcome it.

There's never such a thing as talking too much on this forum. Feel free to say all you want. People here are nice and like to listen

You take care.