This is how my intense self hate grows...
My T did call. And I was a moron. And I acted like a baby.
I hung up on her when she said she meant to call me back but got busy and forgot.
Then I texted her to cancel my next appt and also said I couldn't reschedule. And, I told her to TEXT me only to confirm she got the message.

She of course did phone me right back then. Had a difficult time verbalizing all the feelings I was feeling because basically I just felt like I have all my life >>> I am unimportant and worthless.

Dammit. I am really no use.