granite, please GO anyway!!!!!! Your T is on YOUR side. She wants to help you, and I know that you know that. I know how horrible it feels and how scared you are! You let her in a little and you can't go backwards. But you can go at your own pace. You can go in, sit on the floor, and play a game. Your T will not push you to say more until you are ready.

She does not think you are stupid or horrible or anthing like that. I guarantee it! Therapy is VERY hard. It's not fun, but it will help you feel better. It's a slow process, to quote my T, and the only way out is through.

You can TELL your T you feel like hiding. See if you can get that out. I did that in my session a couple of weeks ago. But please go so you can see that your T is there for you no matter what you say to her. I don't usually like to say these words, but maybe they will help now. It's her job. She's not going to turn you away because it's her job to help you. She CARES AND it's her job, not like telling anyone else. Ts are trained to hear the worst stuff we can say, and to them it's NOT bad because we are good, and we just need help.