And so he finally "got it" after a long time and wrote her a little note and she rewarded him lovingly for it and they lived happily ever after.

It is a little unfortunate, that you want something, he gives it to you, and that makes you angry. What does it matter where you are? You all haven't been that absent from one another that often have you, that he could "learn" what you mean to him when you are away from him? Absence can, in fact, make the heart grow fonder; when you're there with him, doing for him, probably bugging him as much as he bugs you, just in different ways that are only bugsome to him as his are only bugsome to you it probably is hard for him to "understand" the need for him to write little notes to you, how much they mean to you (until he experiences how much your connection means to you).

I think resentment is ours; kind of like disappointment. My T actually made me "meditate" for a week on "disappointment". Naturally, I was immediately disappointed numerous times with my DH, LOL. But what I learned was what I had been "taught" by my stepmother and "believed" to be true was what was causing my disappointment. I was thinking completely in terms of what was "right" according to my teachings/habit rather than the actual situation.

When resentments get to be too thick, I think they come from holding on to other situations we haven't dealt with when they came up?