dear t, this sucks, feeling like i need to go in but afraid to again. do we have a relationship? you have never said that we do. never even talk about it. maybe you don't want one with this patient due to the damage??? that is what i think sometimes. then i think you care and figure you must be crazier than i am. that is not a good feeling. five more days. do you know that everytime i am walking into your office i tell myself that this is the last time and i never have to go back if i don't want to. can we start making appts at the beginning of session or the end so i don't have to call please. please. thank you for letting me vent, ooops, oh yea, its your job to listen. you do well. and make all the right noises. thanks again