Recently it struck me that I'm not really capable of feeling emotions. A friend of mine died a few months ago and I didn't cry or even feel sad; I just went about my normal routine. I loved a girl who recently left the state to start a new life elsewhere and I didn't care about that, either. I converted to Christianity about a year or so ago and I'm already falling flat because I don't care enough to put in the energy, not to mention I don't feel guilt or faith or love. Hell, it's an investment of energy just to write this.

I have no idea if there's a word or something for what I'm suffering. I used to have depression, a long time ago (maybe four or five years ago), and I don't recall ever having felt really strong emotion since then -- just passing things like anxiety, irritation, or contentment. Most of the time I'm just in a state of emotional flat-line. It's like I'm an emotional leper or something.

Does anyone what I can do to end this? I don't want to go through life feeling like an emotionless zombie.