You are doing exactly what you need to be doing in the care of your child and there is NO doubt of the care and love you have for him. Referrals do not take long and you can have an appointment set up in the meantime to get in; it can always be moved (back or up depending) but to make sure it is lined up in the interim. Also if you do not hear from the primary care doc office in a couple of days about the referral, follow-up with them to make sure they call to to bug the insurance company; you can also call the insurance company too to make sure they received it and are processing it. Stay on them.

It is hard but ignore the people on Facebook, truly, unless you are up to confronting them to let them know unless they are in the same position, they can stop judging. Judging may make them feel better, but as you said, you are in a different position. I don't know that everyone considers what they say before they speak sometimes or even before they type, and casting stones is easy when you are behind a wall and not facing it. You hang in there and do what you need to do. You and your family are in my thoughts, sending well wishes your way. Hang in there!!!!