Hello, I am new here and I am also mostly recovered from complex-PTSD.

PTSD has left me a much more empathetic and caring person. My partner is a PTSD-er and her anxiety disorder has kind of been a common / "binding" factor in our relationship growing.

When she is at ease, she is great and all is well. When some stressor exists (typically following some contact with her former husband or son who are both addicted people (gambling and alcohol) I am experiencing relationship difficulties because I cannot take her constant criticism of me. She is relentless and I keep distancing myself from her in an effort to minimise her criticism. She knows she does it and is apologetic.

Things she criticises me about include things like "I am mean", "I am uncaring", "I am not empathetic", "I chat to my son too much", "I spend too much money on moisturiser" ad infinitum. (I am not mean or anything bad - I'm a good guy - I just have not got lots of money to be frivolous with)

Each episode leaves me emotionally more distant as I seek to reduce causation of more criticism and this then becomes a viscious cycle because she calls it "passive-aggressive" behaviour. I guess it is but I am a gentle person and not argumentative, even conflict-avoiding maybe.

These episodes happen at increasing frequency and I am becoming very unhappy. I don't know what to do as she depends on me and is otherwise alone in the world (she is a migrant from eastern Europe). I don;t know whether to seem callous and uncaring and move to end the relationship (but she has nowhere else to go) or ???. I appeal to her to stop criticising me and she keeps bouncing back and is then nice again. I am becoming to feel I should not have partnered with another PTSD-er.

Has anyone got some suggestions here? I have searched and read exisitng questions and could find no suggestions.