Rainbow, it can be hard for people to learn that it is OK to feel emotions of love and even lust towards other humans. We are trained by society that we are "bad" if we feel these normal and healthy emotions. That creates shame. Shame creates pain.

The truth is that feelings are not actions. One can totally enjoy the close emotional contact of a friend or even a T without it leading to boundary crossing. For example, I totally enjoy the one hour I get to spend with my T. I tease him sometimes because I say "Na na na noo noo , I'm allowed to say I love you!" :-)

My opinion is to enjoy these good emotions. Feel through them and go with them in a natural way. Allow yourself to just accept feeling whatever you happen to feel for your T. It will be different than what you will feel for your H or for any other human.

The human heart is a wonderful thing. It may occupy a small space, but the space inside is infinite.

You have PLENTY of room to love as many people as you want!!!