I think you are self diagnosing too much. And you are being awfully hard on yourself.

It is not unusual be feel left behind, especially at your age. You should get a real diagnosis and find a good therapist that can help you build better self esteem.
And when you are talking about your mid teens and having the trouble with self image, that is so normal with all the physical changes that take place right up to the age you are at now.

I think it is wonderful that you have come here and spoken up. You can spend time in the forums and read how much others have the same concerns you have. So, in that you will start to see that you are not so far behind after all.

You aren't really going to know yourself yet, so don't feel that you should, a common concern for your age and during the 20's. Many people don't really find themselves till way after their 20's. Hey you have taken the first step by coming here and trying to speak up. There are a lot of very nice people here to talk to and learn from.

But please don't hide in your room and beat yourself up for issues that are a normal part of growing up, even in your 20's. Try to get a real diagnosis and a support plan with a therapist that specializes in what ever you may have.

And just remember we are all unique, you have qualities about you that are unique and worth investigating and developing. Dont worry about your looks, very few men end up on magazine covers. To be honest, I personally don't think those men are all that handsome. It is the uniqueness that I like. So go and be unique.

Open Eyes