the bills are piled neck high and i havent been working. the thought of going back makes my stomach turn and my hair stand on end but i have no choice. big big trouble. gas and electric both sent shut off notices for delinquent payments and husbands school loans are 250 a month and hes now facing fines in excess of 1200 for driving with a suspended license. did i mention my kids are no longer eligible for the family care free insurance because my husband makes too much money? theres no money for food but we cant get free insurance. what the *&^%! life just doesnt make sense and the hits just keep on coming. rather than wallow in self-pity i've decided to work my ^%$ off six days a week and get this *&^% together because the only advice my parents can give is why dont you just pick up and leave? having first hand knowledge of just how sick and twisted and base and evil the men of the world are i think i'll stick with old reliable husband and his harmelss binge eating. trying not to si, drinking a six pack a day and i guess i better sober up so i can haul my hiney in to work and keep the family afloat. just another crappy crappy day chez moi. just needed to vent as i'm sure i've only mentioned a zillion times i have no friends my parents are twisted and i'm essentially alone in this universe i call hell. trying to sit still because the urge to wander off and find trouble is oh so tempting. thanks for listening.